2/28/2019 0 Comments SPD as a Fashionable ProfessionalThis blog has been a bit heavy lately. Let's perk it up with some good, light-hearted complaining! Y'all, sensory processing disorder is the absolute worst when it comes to finding professional clothing. Let's break this down into the basics: undergarments, apparel, shoes, and accessories. Undergarments I never expected the day to come that I would discuss the contents of my underwear drawer on the internet. But that day is today! So, I like to look and feel sexy just as much as the next girl. But seams and lace and elastic and everything that makes cute undies cute and functional undies functional is just…the worst. Currently, my collection includes a combination of men's compression shorts (the stretchy, skin-tight boxers), big ol' granny panties, and as many seamless satin and soft fabric panties as I can get my hands on. Tags are always removed, and waist seams tend to get ripped so I don't feel too constricted. Do I own thongs? Yes, yes I do. I enjoy them on my better days, and they make me feel incredibly sexy. Do I wear them often? Absolutely not. I wish I could wear them more, but my body just cannot handle it. Bras are a whole other beast (pun somewhat intended). I'm not shy to admit that I am a well-endowed woman. Always have been, probably always will be. Finding a bra that even provides a modicum of support is hard enough in and of itself, never mind finding one that's comfortable! For ladies who care about their bras and maybe feel generally uncomfortable with their current ones, check out r/abrathatfits on Reddit. I found my "proper" size on there, and I even hunted down a couple bras to fit me. They still aren't comfortable for me, though, almost exclusively because of sensory issues. Bras tend to make me feel like I'm being squeezed and confined. The wires tend to dig into me (again, even if it fits well), and I actually feel more tired from wearing one than when I go without. I've more or less abandoned the search for the Holy Grail of bras; instead, I tend to wear either none or a loose shelf bra (my favorite ones are from Hanes or Fruit of the Loom and come in a 3-pack at Walmart). It's not ideal, but I at least feel like I can breathe. Apparel SPD is a weirdly fickle condition. Something that feels all kinds of wrong one day will be perfect fine the next, and vice versa. Generally, I try to stick to fabrics that are relatively soft and loose, though it can sometimes be challenging to find a big enough size. Stiff denim is evil, fleece is smothering, and God forbid I ever touch corduroy! Fit is an issue as well, especially for the neckline of shirts. I doubt I've worn a crew-neck or turtleneck shirt in years, not unless it was three sizes too big and extremely loose. That being said, I love to dress nice and look polished. Dresses are the absolute best, especially nice flowy, ruffly ones with a good stretch fabric or loose cotton. Skirts are in the same vein as far as aesthetics, but the waistband and the liner can sometimes be an issue. That’s also one more scratchy tag I have to deal with, which is why I also tend to tuck my shirts into my skirts. I used to do the same with pants sometimes, but after gaining some weight I'm not crazy about the way it looks on me anymore. Overall, I'd say my style tends to fall somewhere between "actual child," "cute lady lumberjack," and "hot librarian." It ranges from oversized t-shirts and comfy pajama shorts at home to faux-leather skirts, stretchy skinny "jeans," and cute tops or button-up flannels when I'm out with my husband. At work, I love the snug pencil skirt/loose or tucked-in blouse look, which is a surprisingly great look when I'm in my wheelchair. I'm all about the cardigans too when I dress professionally. Haven't found many blazers that look good with my shape (always too big in the shoulders, too long in the arms, and too snug in the bust), but cardigans are fool-proof. Plus they're great when it's too chilly in the office or if I get way too hot--can't do much to reduce the warmth from a sweater or blouse, so a cardigan over a shorter-sleeve top works perfectly. At home, I tend to get a little weirder with my dress. Our HVAC system is a bit dysfunctional, so the house swings wildly between freezing cold and blazing hot. Depending on how well my body is handling the temperature change, it may be as simple as getting a blanket or ditching my top layer of clothes…or as extreme as being unable to function without head-to-toe warmth (typically provided by nice warm onesies and socks) or stark nakedness. I remember having the flu last year and feeling actual, physical pain from trying to wear clothes because my skin felt like it was on fire. This happens a bit more than I'd like to admit…but at least it's in the privacy of my own home! Shoes Ugh. Shoes are the worst. I've had problems with my feet for most of my life, though I really don't know why. I assume it's a genetic thing, since I've been told my grandmother has similar issues. To put it more clearly, I don't have human feet--I have duck feet. No, I don't have webbed toes, just feet that are flat as a pancake and shaped almost exactly like a triangle. A podiatrist I saw actually pointed out that not only do I have flat feet, but an uncommon type where they look normal until I stand on them. At that point, they flatten out entirely. Possibly because of that, I also have an "awkward gait" which my husband refers to as a "waddle." Sometimes I hate him…even if he's right. Anyway, the flatness, wideness, and simultaneous narrow heel of my feet means that shoes fit me hella weird. If it's wide enough for the widest part, it completely slips off my heel. That slippage, plus the overall shortness of my feet and ankles, means that my heels are constantly being scraped and cut if I wear anything but very soft, cloth/canvas sneakers (like Toms or those cheap Keds-looking knock-offs from Walmart). In fact, I've been wearing the same pair of knock-off Keds for at least six months now, primarily because I haven't seen a similar style in the store in a while and I really don't want to hurt my feet breaking in a new pair. I tend to find some okay sandals in the spring and summer, mostly ones made for old ladies and that have lots of soft, non-abrasive material and no raised places on the sole. Fabric flip-flops are great for most of my foot, but my soles ache if I walk more than a short distance simply because of the grip needed to keep the shoes on my feet. Out of any part of my outfits, shoes are the hardest to manage. I can wear comfortable sneakers and athletic shoes, but those certainly aren't professional, and they don't "go" with everything. For example, it looks pretty weird to have on some big, clunky New Balance sneakers when you're wearing a sundress or nice business attire. Sure, some girls on Pinterest can pull off stuff like that, but not short, chunky little women with ankles that magically disappear in anything but sandals. Boots are nice, but they're hard to find in size "tiny wide foot/giant calf" and they can also run into issues of being too narrow or scrubbing my heel. The pairs I have now are the same ones I've had for years, simply because I haven't been able to find replacements. The other rub (haha) about shoes is just how expensive they can get. Anything that's made for more unusual shaped feet like mine is typically around $100 at the lowest for a single pair of super ugly shoes that will get worn out in maybe six months. I'm a broke student--there's no way I can afford anything close to that multiple times a year, never mind having more than one pair so they each last longer. Yes, the investment would be worth it, but I don't have the capital up-front to invest. Not to mention it just feels wrong to drop so much on a single item that, by definition, can't last very long. One benefit of using a wheelchair in a professional environment is that I don't have to be so concerned about the fit of my shoes. As long as they don't pinch my toes and scrub my heels when I'm sitting, I can get away with wearing cute shoes a lot more. Once I get my new wheelchair with an adjustable footplate, I'm really looking forward to playing around with heels and booties and shoes that I normally never get to wear. Maybe one of these days, comfort will return to the world of cheap and fashionable shoes, but in the meantime I guess me and my Keds will keep rocking.
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